Do you have any idea what I’m going through? Work is killing me. Yes, by Frank standards, I am rich! It seems like Scrooge McDuck rich. I mean, if I am running errands, I can just stop at a deli and buy a sandwich. I don’t even think about it. When I buy rice, I choose Basmati over Jasmine, because it is somewhat better, even though it is a lot more expensive. I’m rich! Rich I tell you! But I’m also totally stressed out.
I manage a gaggle of writers. (Look it up: it’s a tower of giraffes and a gaggle of writers — really!) And they have me in a state of anxiety. It isn’t because they are bad. It’s because they are great! Really: I’ve known a lot of “professional” writers in my day and most of them didn’t deserve the status of “writer” much less “professional.” But this group is really good. Some of them are — and I know this will shock you — as good as I am. But this sucks! Because it’s made me very paternal toward them. I worry that they get enough work and that they realize just how wonderful I think they are.
But it isn’t just that. There’s a whole technical side of things. And everything is different. The company I work for is typical of something that started small and grew from emergency to emergency. These are, of course, the best kinds of companies to work for. It means that they are run by creative people who don’t feel the need to plan everything out in advance. But it does leave me with having to remember a whole lot of weird things. And that would be fine if I were still 26 years old with a mind so sharp it could cut peas. But now I have a mind that is more likely to create a squished spot of green.
When I started working seriously for this company, I tried to work four hours per day. Now, I get four hours in before I finish my tea. I could easily work 12 hours per day. But instead, but I love all you so much (and because this blog gives my life some sense of meaning), I work for about four hours, then I write the daily feature here (Like this exciting one!) and then I work a couple of more hours and then I write the morning posts and then I make dinner and then… Well then I spend the rest of the night trying to not end my day just further behind than I started!
And I can’t even take time off. I try! I keep very careful records of the work I do. So I will “sign off” — make a note in my spreadsheet. And then I will notice an email that has to be dealt with and this or that little thing, and before I know it, I’ve worked for a half hour and I figure: screw it, I’m back on the clock. Don’t get me wrong: I’m well paid and I have a great luxury in American life: I can work as much as I want at a job that I actually rather like with really fantastic people. (Really! You wouldn’t believe it! For the last eight years, the internet has been very low energy. We’re going to make the internet great again!)
So next week, I’m planning to get out of town for two days. I’ll still work, of course. I’m afraid if I stop working, the sun may not rise in the morning. I’m not certain, but do any of you really want to take the risk? As a result, I think I’m going to post some of my fiction. It’s old stuff, but still work that I think is pretty good. And if I’m feeling very adventurous, I might even post the first episode of “The Post Postmodern Comedy Hour,” which is probably the most perfect piece of self-expression I’ve ever written. But if you could put up with me whining about my life all these years, you can certainly put up with that!
Afterword
This is also meant to inspire me to work on “Donna Q,” which I’ve been playing with for months. You can probably guess what it is about. But would you imagine in all takes place in a Starbucks? No, I suspect not.
On this day in 1919,
When I was looking for an image to start this
Google knows me better than I know myself
Today’s song is “Jurassic Park.” Elizabeth commented, “Since I think you mentioned you don’t like MacArthur Park, this might cheer you up. Plus claymation!” Well, she was half right. I am a big fan of claymation, and in fact, every kind of animation. One of the great things about never having kids is that you aren’t required to ever act like an adult. (Note to all you parents out there: I know you’re all pretenders!)
On this day in 1993, Intel released the first Pentium CPU. It ran at 60 MHz — 60 million cycles per second. Think about that: the little clock inside that chip was going from 0 to 5 volts and back to 0 volts: 60 million times every second! That still boggles my mind. Meanwhile, the computer I’m writing this on has a clock speed of 3.1 GHz — 3,100 million cycles per second — fifty times faster. I think the more you know about computers, the more amazing they are. To most people they are just a given. It shocks me that this all works.
I’d like to discuss Social Security in a roundabout way. I do a lot of work that deals with web hosting companies. Most of them offer some kind of money-back guarantee. And the better ones will add something like, “No questions asked!” It got me thinking of a small minded business owner who offers a money-back guarantee and then grouses every time someone takes them up on it. What’s with that?
I think the Morning Music posts have gotten rather boring. It’s just a matter of time and focus. If I weren’t so overworked, I’d be able to inject some passion into the project. But in the mean time, I thought I might inject some of your passion into the process. I’d like you all to give me exercises that I could do. And to start it all, I asked Elizabeth to recommend six Weird Al Yankovic songs, since she seems to like him.
On this day in 1413, Henry V of England became king. He was king for less than ten years, due to his early death. And his reputation really is just due to the British victory at the
The reason Democrats treat these professionals so respectfully in everything from trade deals to urban bike paths is because that is simply who the Democrats are today. Read through the party’s favorite works of political theory from the last few decades and you repeatedly encounter the same message: the highly credentialled experts and innovators at the top of the nation’s hierarchy of achievement belong there by virtue of their brilliance. That these people also happen to be colleagues and classmates of leading Democrats only reinforces the party’s identification with them. Liberals love to mock the One Percent and their self-serving ideology, but they themselves serve the needs of the top 10% just as blindly.
Kevin Drum made a huge mistake in an article last week,
I remember in 1995, a student of mine telling me the only good thing about the internet was porn. He wasn’t actually making the case for porn; he was more making the case that the internet sucked. He was largely right. But today, the internet really is an amazing thing. In the old days, there would be little gems that people would have. For example, one guy I knew had a cassette he recorded off the radio of three tracks Talking Heads had recorded back in 1975 when they were still a trio. Now, just enter “Talking Heads Demo” into Google and it’s right there. Listen to