When I recently discussed fucktard, I was sad to see that the tard ending was short for retard. (I know! I’m dense! Go read someone else if you don’t like it!) Up to that point, I had thought that fucktard was a charming linguistic invention. It is true that retard is not generally a word used to describe those with Down’s Syndrome and such—at least not among the sort of people I know. It is normally used to describe someone like me, “What a retard! You didn’t know that fucktard was a contraction for fuck and retard?” But the word retard has a bad history—generally as bad as nigger or kike.
This has brought me back to a variation that is nothing but a delight: fuck-a-doodle-doo. (Of course, what do I know? But I’m pretty sure this is just putting fuck at the beginning of cock-a-doodle-doo. Right?) There are two definitions of this word on Urban Dictionary. The first, entered in September 2004, is:
“He’s fun to have around.”
“Why? ‘Cos he can impersonate an orangutang? Fuck-a-doodle-doo!”
The second is from March 2005, but it misspells the word “Fuck-a-doodle-do”:
Wayne: “He’s cool because he has nice hair…”
It is interesting that both of these definitions refer to Sean of the Dead. It is a good reference, but certainly not the first. The first appearance of the word that I know of (although almost certainly not the first) is 11 years earlier in Four Weddings and a Funeral. In it, after Carrie says “I do” at her wedding, Charles says to himself, “Fuck-a-doodle-doo.” He is heartbroken.
This scene also shows that the definitions on Urban Dictionary are wrong. Fuck-a-doodle-doo is just an expletive. It can be used in joy or sadness, but as with all expletives expresses something ineffable.