Put Away Corporate Robot Things and Love the Tap

No Bottled WaterAccording to the Water Information Program, the human body is more than 60 percent water. Blood is 92 percent water. The brain and muscles are 75 percent water. An average human can survive for a month or more without food, but only perhaps a week without water. Water rocks! According to the United Nations, 11 person of the world still lives without access to clean water. According to water.org, each year 3.4 million people die from diseases related to a lack of clean water. I am a big supporter of clean water!

What I am not a big supporter of is bottled water and Amerca’s obsession with it. If you are like 99 percent of Americans, you can walk into your kitchen and pour a nice big glass of clean life giving water. You can drink it down! Doesn’t that taste and feel good? Well, if it doesn’t, you are a fucking retard.

Look: I understand that there are various things found in tap water that can make it taste more or less good. And if you want to invest in a simple and cheap water filtration system, good for you. Or you could just drink the water cold, which gets rid of most of the taste. But bottled water, bought in bulk, costs about $3 per gallon. Those machines at the supermarket only charge 35 cents. Out of your tap is is less than a cent.

Not only this, bottled water is an environmental disaster. According to The Water Project, most water bottles cannot be recycled. As many as 80 percent of these bottles simply become litter. They take over a thousand years to degrade. There are now over two million tons of water bottles in US landfills. Manufacturing the bottles takes large amounts of energy. And best of all, it is estimated to take 3 gallons of water to create every gallon of bottled water.

Why am I on about this? Because I saw the following story about Ray’s & Stark Bar, an LA restaurant, that is offering a 23-page “water menu.” They say that water has a significant impact on how we taste food. Get it? It’s like a wine list. Only for water. The menu even provides “taste profiles” of the different water brands—most of which are shipped from outside the country. So you can add that onto your carbon footprint.

This is all pathetic. The essence of water is that it does not have much of a taste. This is why people have traditionally enjoyed ice water. It is not like wine that has a very distinct taste and a great variation. This is just a (smart) pretentious restaurant appealing to their (stupid) pretentious customers. But they are only slightly worse than people buying bottled water by the case at the grocery store. And I would note that very few people felt the need to carry water on them at all times until PepsiCo and Nestle started marketing their evil con game.

When I was a corporate robot, I spake as a corporate robot, I understood as a corporate robot, I thought as a corporate robot: but when I became a human, I put away corporate robot things.

Love the tap. Value the tap. Live the tap.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *