I’m not Calvin Trillin, but I’ve written a couple of political poems recently. The first sums up the Republican Party, and to a lesser extent the conservative movement. As you may recall, reproductive rights were more a Republican issue around the time of Roe V. Wade. And in the 1950s, voting rights were at least widely supported in the party. But the Republican Party has been committed to the interests of the rich in modern times. This has meant that they’ve been forced to make some unholy alliances. In the 1960s, it was with racists (although it took a while to pry that voting block away from the Democrats). In the 1970s, it was with the Christian fundamentalists.

Republican Coalition

Give those tax cuts to the rich
Show war mongers your big dicks
Pander to the racist hicks
Vaginal probes for all the chicks!

This next one I wanted to do with illustrations, but it was not to be. I also thought I would make it longer. You’ll get the idea. It is about the Confidence Fairy. This is a mythical creature that Paul Krugman invented. It is based on the belief of austerians and other assorted Deficit Scolds who claim that balancing the federal budget will instill confidence in the markets and cause growth. It is a nice idea, but the economy just doesn’t work that way, as the last 4 years have shown throughout the world. Krugman claimed that these people believed in the Confidence Fairy who (like the Great Pumpkin) will magically appear to reward good economies who balance their budgets.

The Confidence Fairy

The Confidence Fairy
Her powers will shock
Bond rates sink lower
She’ll goose up your stock!

The Confidence Fairy
She may be a myth
But she’s still effective
At helping the rich.

That’s all for now kiddos. As usual: if you don’t like the content, you get your full money back! And if you want to read real poetry, why are you here? Go over to The Good Typist.