If you really want to understand me (And why would you?) you would first need to understand that I have no idea who Christina Aguilera is. Well, that’s not exactly true. Based upon my research for this article, I have come to think that she is a singer. But I don’t care. I’m sure she’s either some American Idol screamer or Justin Bieber technological phenomenon. That is to say that I’m sure she is just another example of everything that is wrong with our culture. I’d be pleased if I were wrong and if I am, I’m sure I’ll get mail telling me that, “No! She’s great. She’s a modern fucking Janis Joplin.” But I doubt it.

Anyway, this morning I got this tweet:

ho. ly. shit. RT @davestopera: this is the alpha and the omega of google searches google.com/search?q=dying… (h/t @impaulgale)

— Ryan Broderick (@ryanhatesthis) December 7, 2012

So I clicked. The alpha and omega of Google searches? I’m a sucker for a good techno come on. And what I got was this:

If you can’t make it out, click on the image to see it in all its glory. But you don’t really have to. It is a Google image search of “dying grandparents” and pretty much all the results are pictures of a blond woman I have since learned in Christina Aguilera.

This all goes back to June when the Huffington Post reported, Christina Aguilera Snubs Dying Grandparents, Says Estranged Uncle. Apparently, she hates all of her family. I don’t know. I don’t care. But it does kind of sum up even the best search engines. A search for “dying parents” really shouldn’t bring up a bunch of pictures of a young singer. Oh well.

At least you got to see a detail of Samuel Richards’ Evangeline Discovering Her Affianced in the Hospital. See the whole thing on Wikipedia!