Topless Car Wash Crack Down

Topless Car WashDerrick Belcher claims to be a libertarian. If I could, I would get rid of the word “libertarian” because it is just a meaningless word that conservatives use. Sure, there are libertarians who hate the Republican Party as much or more than they hate the Democratic Party. But such people are very rare and with notable exceptions, hidden. So it is better to think of Derrick Belcher as a conservative and not the “absolute Libertarian” he calls himself.

He lives in Alabama and, like so many other conservative loons, he wants to secede from the union. The reason I know he is just another conservative is what he says about secession, “I don’t think any one state can stand alone. But if we’ve got 20 of them, then that starts to be something.” He means 20 red states, of course (more on that in a moment). “Libertarian” is not the first word that comes to mind when you think of Mississippi, Arkansas, and West Virginia. “Poor” might be the first word, given that they are the poorest states in the union.

But Belcher has an answer to that! “If you look at a map of the red states, we have all of the oil and we produce all of the food. We’re the ones that are carrying the rest of the nation.” You didn’t expect him to be right did you? Of the top six agricultural states, three of them are bright blue. And combined, they produce more food than the three red states. Of oil producing states, two of the top six are blue. Same for natural gas. And the same for coal. (Surprisingly, bright blue Illinois produces twice as much coal are red West Virginia.)

Of course, none of this really matters. Energy and food are transported. But I suspect that Belcher wants his new confederation of states to be truly independent. Good for him! And good luck to him, because it is a stupid idea as any economist will tell you.

What Mr. Belcher seems most upset about is that back in 2001, the government shut down his topless car wash.[1] He said, “The government ripped my business away, and now they’re choking America to death with rules and regulations.” According to the article:

“The American people are being mistreated by the federal government and there is absolutley no reason why we shouldn’t end this treatment from the federal government,” Belcher told WKRG. “And I guess there is a part of me that is angry because my government has mistreated me year after year after year and I am fed up with it and I know there are several other people in this state and all across the country that are fed up with it as well.”

This is typical of conservatives. It is very frustrating to talk to conservatives about the Middle East because in their minds, there are only two kinds of people there: Israelis and Not Israelis. This is also true if you include India, Pakistan, and Afghanistan. And here Belcher doesn’t seem to understand that there are different levels of government. They must all be the feds! It wasn’t the federal government which shut down his “nasty wash”; it was the state of Alabama.

The truth is, if Derrick Belcher were a libertarian as he claims, he would be worried that big liberty-killing laws would be enacted by the social conservatives in an independent Alabama. But that is doubtless not what this is all about. He said he is angry. And when a conservative is angry, they don’t really care if, say, they attack the wrong country. So what the hell: the state passed a law he doesn’t like; separate from the nation!

[1] In many ways, I am a very naive man. When I read he had a “topless car wash” I thought it was a car wash for convertibles. All of my readers are hereby on notice that this is charming and not pathetic! (BTW: the image above is from a “topless” car wash where they the bottom part of your car for free but charged $5 to do the top. So there!)

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About Frank Moraes

Frank Moraes is a freelance writer and editor online and in print. He is educated as a scientist with a PhD in Atmospheric Physics. He has worked in climate science, remote sensing, throughout the computer industry, and as a college physics instructor. Find out more at About Frank Moraes.

0 thoughts on “Topless Car Wash Crack Down

  1. First off…This so called man was my best freind for about 7-yrs..I managed the carwash..and also excepted him into my family..I’m the one who bailed him out of jail when his family would NOT have anything to do with him…Me and my wife started the trucking co. with his parents backing so that he could get a ligit job and hopefully stear him in the right direction..4 mos. later they decided they could do better with-out my help and TOOK the truck and trailer and hid them…Had to go to court,and company was desolved.He has never had a REAL job,besides parking cars at a local rest.And the carwash wasn’t shut down by the new laws that was passed…Those laws stipulated that if you served alcohal your co. could not go nude…His carwash did not serve alcohal to anybody but the 18yr old girls that fell into his trap of passing out and him taking advantage of them…When those laws was passed..he went from topless to totaly nude..And his landlord would not renew his rental lease..which was mainly for not paying..and he couldn’t afford another building.. His parents have always supported him(except for the year i did)He received disability checks from the Gov.because he was hit upside the head with a batt(Right side face)from a supossed robbery(wink-wink)The carwash had never made a profit in the 4yrs it was open(NOT 10yrs) No girls would work there…except the crack head/prostitute types!!..And Rick….If you do happen to read this…you know who i am…and i haven’t forgot about you…I will see you again..someday,and you know what you got coming,but by the looks of you now…it probably needs to be soon,because it don’t look like you have long left here.(we are going to have a sit down conversation)..tell the devel you want to succeed worthless excuse for a human….the world will be a much better place(specially for kids) when your worm dirt !!! DISCLAIMER-These are my oppinions on Derrick Owen Belcher..Who still lives with his poor/nice parents in Mobile Al.They’re just not real smart…And anybody that really knows this predator..And to the people that think they are following a good cause…maybe you are..Its that person that you have no clue about !!!PLEASE STAY AWAY FROM THIS PERSON AND ANY THING HE STANDS FOR!!!!!!!!!!!I hope you allow this comment,but if it needs editing,let me know..I’ll tell you EVERYTHING,and you can write it how-ever you choose !! By-Biggnnn n Bama

  2. @Bama Boy – If I had any money, I would worry about getting sued. I don’t know what the law says about comments. And you do provide a disclaimer anyway.

    There are some very interesting bits of information in there. Clearly, you two have a history that I would like to stay out of. But other than accounting for the story coming from your perspective and thus having that kind of bias, I find it all very believable. I’m especially interested in how his car wash got shut down. I can definitely see someone over-playing that hand. I don’t have a problem with that. But later saying you were shut down by the government? That’s just hypocrisy.

  3. Thanks for posting my previous comments about Derrick..To clear a couple of things up about the laws that was passed it was the city of Mobile that passed them…What the laws were was that if you served alcohal you couldn’t go nude…If you chose to serve alcohal,you could only go topless…And also you could not be located within 2,500 ft of a school/church..These laws were passed mainly for the strip clubs that was located on the main commercial blv. here…Because of the big clubs that actually made alot of money,and had 50 or so dancers…All but 1 shut down within a year..He was located in a basically ALL african neighbor "hood"..These laws/ordences had nothing to do with him…He just pissed the city off by going from topless only to totally nude when they passed the laws…I think he thought he was scarface or something..just minus the spine..He also is a certified skittsoe..he thought his landlord had let the Gov. put cameras on the building next door to watch him..He also had a stent in Searcy Mental Hospital here for that…I would assume that he still receives that mental check from the Gov..And it made him proud that he received them…from US,the actual people that work and file taxes like we’re supposed to do!! I really don’t see a problem with me making these statements about him because i KNOW its the truth !! Maybe his time is better served by finding the cameras that BIG BROTHER put all around his parents neighborhood!!I had no clue till i googled his name (as i do every now again)in hoping to find out some good news that he is incarcerated or an obituary notice..I will make this comment about the City of Mobile AL. They did not care one bit that he had this topless carwash…He included himself into it because he was jealous that they ignored him and his empire..He went to the city council meetings and stirred it up and shoved it in their face (very obnoxiously by the way) and that was all it took..But,the city nor county nor state had anything to do with that place shutting down,or i would give them credit for actually doing something besides raising our taxes to pay for their vacations..You know..theres alot wrong with our Gov.but i wouldn’t even think about leaving it !!What i relly can’t beleive is the local ch-5 for doing the interview.. Thanks for your time..and i hope that the public understands a lil about the type of person they are signing up with and hope that some how they continue the stand they are trying to make,they honestly just don’t know this self proclaimed wicket..Please get another face figure for your cause…you do not want him to think everybody that signs this petition is his followers !! .. and as i stated before-These are my opinions of Derrick Owen Belcher of Mobile AL. And i will rest my case on the subject…You have the right to choose your on roads in this country…Do it !!

  4. I worked for this man for a few months – let me first make it clear that I am not nor ever have been a crackhead or a prostitute. During the period I worked there, he was adamant about no sexual activity (not that I would have, but he made that clear up front). That is the only nice thing I have to say about the man.

    He did not work – he took in money and sat on his ass. He didn’t man the door half the time, if I wanted to earn money some days I had to open the place myself. He was a card carrying Klan member, first I ever met in my life. He was insane, barely if ever paid his bills. I actually loaned him money from my own income at the time to help pay the rent or electricity on more than one occasion. I was lucky, this was a curiousity job for me, I wanted to see what working nude was like – I got out after about four months but it was the freakiest time of my life. For the record, the girls were going "totally nude" for the entire time he was open – for a whole $10 more on your carwash. He may not have advertised it, but it was how 90% of the washes went. The ladies made only tips unless the nude option was requested, then we got the huge $10 fee *sarcasm*.

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