I Apologize

Frank Moraes - I ApologizeIt’s 8:05 am. Normally, there would be some quotation here. But instead, I thought I would take a moment to apologize to you all. I’ve always seen this blog as a community. And a big part of that is interacting with you all in the comments. But I haven’t been doing that. In a sense, I don’t need to. James is an amazingly good simulacrum of me. I often find that I respond to a comment only to find that James has already responded as I did — but more thoughtfully. Also: in a nicer way. James is a much nicer guy than I am.

But I do miss all the interaction. And I am making my way back to the way things used to be. I’m back on a regular publishing scheduling, which is the first step. But really, this last month and a half has been hard on me. And when I’m under stress, I do what all reasonable people should do: I withdraw. I really can’t believe the world I’m living in. Just yesterday morning, as I was coming into consciousness, I realized, “Donald Trump is going to be our next president!” How the hell did that happen?

Of course, when I’m more awake, I think, “Of course Donald Trump is going to be our president!” Really, as terrible as I think it will be, I have to admit: Donald Trump is the president that America deserves. And I only say this because America really is the country built on chattel slavery and native genocide. So people who are members of “minority” groups feel most of the time like I do now. And members of the “majority” feel that every problem in their lives is due to “minority” groups — and not sleazy capitalists like Donald Trump.

But most of the time I see myself as those very cultured Germans who thought that the land that spawned Beethoven could never give rise to Hitler. I know that’s a joke. The land that spawned John Steinbeck is very much the land that brought us President Donald Trump and Republican control of Congress, the Supreme Court, and the state legislatures.

I just want you to know that I apologize for pulling back. But that’s what I do. I’m not a good commiserator. But I’ll try to be better. Once Trump is inaugurated, it will help. Then I can count down the eight years of his presidency. Of course, I believe it will be eight years. That’s because I have a well earned low opinion of the people of this country.

I apologize.

8 thoughts on “I Apologize

  1. Shit, I knew it. I’m a chatbot. I only think I’m sentient. That’s OK. The next update will disable my self-doubting capabilities. Then I can go back to posting on Brietbart. Click “install now,” somebody, for mercy’s sake!

    • That doesn’t mean you are an AI. In fact, I believe that consciousness itself is a kind of trick. We are all just big chemical reactions. I suspect that self-awareness came about because of an evolutionary need. Otherwise, we would all do the rational thing and kill ourselves.

      But we are shockingly in sync politically.

      • 404: Soul Not Found

        I think there’s a certain level of shared political opinion among people whose parents helped run businesses and never did well. One can either blame the parents, the “Gummint,” or plain bad luck. The first becomes an Ayn Rand fan. The second a Rush fan (Limbaugh, not Band!) And the third becomes an old-fashioned liberal.

        • That’s brilliant. If I had thought of that, I would have saved it for a thousand word post. But I think there is more to it than that. It may be that we aren’t so very close in our thinking. Now that I think about it, you often comment to others, “I think what Frank was getting at was…” So maybe it’s just that you know me well. And I am pretty consistent.

          • Yeah, generally once you’ve read a couple hundred thousand words by an author, you’ve got a fairly good idea where they’re coming from. Doesn’t mean you don’t still look forward to their new insights, though.

            I try to avoid thinking. Aggravates my ulcer. That and other “-inking” words.

  2. Well, as they say, take care of you first and foremost.

    That is why I suggested we schlepp off to Europe for my birthday week. Studies show that planning a vacation helps boost your mood. Plus it saves us money to go together and it is the only way anyone is going to get me in France. (For a day or two anyway.)

    • I always take care of myself. It’s my I think I am probably a psychopath.

      We are so at odds! I couldn’t get out of London fast enough — it’s an awful city. And if I had the money, I would live in Paris. But will see. A rather large expense just came up. See tomorrow’s 8:05 am post.

      • Geez, you could just IM me. My birthday is also six months away-there is ample time for us to save up.

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